This is the way we love
by xxx-angelin-xxx
Summary: "They share a last kiss in another empty classroom before they board the Hogwarts Express. This, them, was never meant to be. Feelings stay unshared. They don't even exchange a single word: it's easier that way..." A Rose/Scorpius oneshot.


**For some reason, all I can write lately is tragic love. I hope I'll get over it:p**

**This is for Rachel's (R.G.B. Duckie) birthday: Happy Birthday, dear! We might not know each other very well but I thought I should do my best and write for someone with whom I share interests;) I hope you'll enjoy this!**

**RosesAreRed4242 was once again a wonderful beta reader and helped me a lot with her comments.**

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This is the way we love

She loves him. Always had, always will. And she finds out with the worst timing possible.

But this is how it had always been with her. She's the one with the wrong timing, she's the one that falls onto things and people, she's the clumsy one, the one whose hair is uncontrollable every time it must be perfect.

And now, she's the Weasley who fell in love with a Malfoy.

.

She's not the most beautiful girl in the school. But she's somehow charming; the way she bits her lip in concentration and confusion. The way she's so nice to everyone without being victimized. The way she's so smart but is never cocky about it.

He loves her. He loves all the little things about her. He loves to hate her, he loves to love her. He's a Malfoy, though and this doesn't make sense. And that makes him bite his lip in confusion too.

.

It's their last day in Hogwarts. Their last day ever. No more lessons, no more parties, no more shagging in broom closets or empty classrooms. Grown-up life is here; they have to be serious and build their future.

But when will they actually _live _the future?

That's what she wonders as she sits in her regular place in the Great Hall. The ending feast is the same as every year. Only her feelings are different.

She looks all around, replaying distant memories. A wave of nostalgia overwhelms her along with worry about the future. And then there are the memories of _him_.

.

_Leaving Hogwarts doesn't feel that bad,_ he decides. He is a little afraid of what will follow, of course, but being a Malfoy makes him sure of himself. No, not really: being _who _he is makes him sure of himself.

But being a Malfoy is part of him. He is who is because he was raised like that, because his family are who they are and did what they did. He's cold and distant and oblivious because he doesn't care about anyone but himself. And he does so because he's a Malfoy.

Probably being a Malfoy made him fall for her. He never liked her; her, and her stuck-up nose. He wanted to hate her, but he couldn't. Her entire family had a feud with him but she never did anything against him. Apart from trying to beat him in every lesson.

Damn her! Why did she have to be that nice?

So, he couldn't hate her, not at the beginning at least. Much later - around their fifth year, when they were both prefects, their daily fight started. And now they were both Heads and, at his seventeen, he could finally identify his past feelings as simple attraction.

Which had developed into so much more.

He realizes it's all his fault. He brought it on himself; he did it when he chose to kiss her in order to shut her mouth, he did it when he fucked her in the broom closet. He did when he chose to continue this "fling" between them.

Only, it's not a fling anymore. It's so much more, but it's going to end before even beginning. Because he won't see her again.

.

The first time they actually talked to each other civilly was Friday night after patrol. She remember that day because… probably because she might felt something back then. There's no other explanation for that.

She was sitting at the closet's floor, watching him search for his tie.

"I have it," She murmured, handing it to him.

He seemed surprised by her quiet tone. "Uh, thanks."

"So, why has everything always got to be so perfect?" she suddenly asked.

"What?"

"You know, your looks. Why?"

He shrugged. "I don't know. I guess I like it."

"Girls like it too." She noticed.

"I know." He smirked, pleased with himself. "Why do you always have to be so nice?"

She seemed confused. "If you haven't done anything to me, why wouldn't I be nice to you?"

He looked at her, unsure, before sitting next to her. "You see? You are too nice."

Her answer was a smile.

They talked about everything and nothing that night. She didn't know what time it was when she returned to her dormitory. All she knew was that from that day onwards, everything between them changed. They talked more, during patrol and afterwards. They exchanged a nod between lessons. They were being friendly, and they both liked this new form of their relationship.

.

He recalls the day - only a month ago - that she made him feel jealous for the first time in his life. He had dared her to as had she. He failed. _Totally_.

It wasn't hard. A smile, a look full of meaning to one of her fellow Gryffindors, some whispering in his ear and Scorpius felt his heartbeat rise dangerously.

"Weasley, can I talk to you for while?" He interrupted their conversation with a look of disgust in his face.

She nodded and let him literally drag her out of the library to the hall, until he found an empty classroom and shoved her inside.

Once they were there he didn't know what to do. He couldn't even look at her; he was starring out of the window, trying to calm down, when he felt her hand on his shoulder. He turned to find her smile. A friendly look, a chaste kiss were enough to move past this.

But now he knows what it meant.

.

They share a last kiss in another empty classroom before they board the Hogwarts Express.

She moans his name into his lips one last time. He caresses her hair and tangles his fingers in soft, red curls one last time. She's left breathless one last time. He feels his heartbeat rise one last time.

He has to leave the only girl that ever made him feel. Probably because she was the only real girl he's ever met.

She has to leave the only boy that ever made her feel something true. Probably because he was so different than everyone else.

It's hard to pull away but they both know they have to. This, _them, _was never meant to be.

Feelings stay unshared. They don't even exchange a single word: it's easier that way.

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This is the way we love.

_Like it's forever_

_Then live the rest of our lives,_

_But not together_


End file.
